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Archive for April, 2011

I have a little hobby not all down-to-Earth people find useful. I search for material embodiments of words, like for example flies are the embodiment of pestilence for me. However, the dragonfly is a completely different thing. If I can classify it, it would be as the embodiment of “fine”, because frankly it is the most fragile animal I can still find around, along with the butterfly. Recently I even bought metal dragonfly wall decor with the idea other people think of the dragonfly in the same way as me. It’s always good for your image to have something fine and tasteful on your wall and metal decorations are far better than movie posters, believe me! I am having a bit of a tackle with where to hang it, but I’ll figure it out soon and I will have a better looking home the least.

Stupid questions are a tradition. They are so deeply embedded in everyday life nobody wonders how meaningless they really are. The question on the top of the chart must be “Are you sleeping?” What kind of a question is that? Anyway, I can think of many other questions that just as idiotic and evoke answers that don’t always match the question. For example “How are you doing?” questions like these never need an accurate and truthful answer. They are like a faceless greet, they are an overture you don’t really care about. Oh, I got another one! When you state an opinion the other part, not always listening attentively, asks “You really think so?” Well, doh, yes! Honestly, sometimes people act so stupid I can’t stand them! I know they are not so foolish, they just don’t want to move their brains so they’d think up something better!

The last three weeks I’ve been having a common cold. It is very easy to catch it , but difficult to get rid of. I hate having a cold in the middle of the summer. Having a cold in the winter is more acceptable but in the summer is very unpleasant.

Most people do not know how they get it and why it is difficult to get rid of even with the help of doctors. To my surprises I learned that common cold has nothing to do with cold itself. These are viruses and they are so many in the air around us and we just breathe them in.

I am ready to laugh at any naïve human who states he owns nobody anything. That’s impossible, that’s absurd. You tell me you have no mortgage? You will have in the future. I’m almost certain in it. You have no student loan? Maybe you were a smart kid or very precautious. But however you look at it, you are doomed to owing people money and owing the country money too possibly. You can’t make a career and raise children without that with the average salary in this country. Even in this vast land of possibilities you need a credit card, which is just like owing money, actually. You have to pay an interest on that card too. If you want to say you owe nobody nothing you are probably one of those rags to riches people who got lucky and very rich, but you still have to owe something! It’s impossible to make a living in this society otherwise.

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There must be something wrong with me. I see girls who are not pretty by birth, some of them take care for their looks, others don’t; but I’ve seen both types sincerely loved. I miss that great experience, the “forever alone” meme fits me perfectly and I am not even that much into the internet. I don’t look very well and I have no discipline in the care for beauty. I try to teach myself to apply facial masks weekly and wear makeup more often, but I can’t put myself to it. I know there is something more important than looks and I want to be loved not only for them. On the other hand I put a great accent on beauty. No matter how I try to reason beauty is not all I know we live in a superficial world and it is much more easy to be beautiful. You can find decent men like that too. I’m torn apart. I want to be prettier and I do nothing much about it.

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Sometimes it happens to me to mistake a male singer for a female. That are usually the bands I start to love. It’s amazing how some men have such tremendous vocal abilities! I can name a few that manage to sing both in the very low tones and the very high. Cee-Lo Green is a great example, this small fat man has a beautiful and rich voice, I can listen to his Gnarles Barkley albums for hours. The same goes for Foxy Shazam and Circa and a number of other males with unique voices. You can make no mistake who is singing when you hear them, once you know who they are. I suppose they are normal men, because once when only men were allowed to sing in choirs. So some men had to sing like girls and the ones with the most beautiful voices got forcefully castrated so their voices would not mutate. I’m glad that’s in the past now.

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I was talking to the boys last week and asked them what dog should my girlfriend and I get. They reacted as if I was going to have a baby, they were open-mouthed and wide-eyed. “Hey, what’s the big deal? It’s just a dog, I like dogs!” and one explained to me there is a female rule that states “Get a dog to train him!” Well, train me for what? Oh, for marriage and raising a kid? Oh…but Tanya doesn’t want kids, at least not yet, she hasn’t uttered a word! But of course she won’t say anything, it’s clear she’ll scare me. Tanya is smart. But even if the dog is a training that doesn’t mean she’ll expect a marriage and a baby in a year’s time. The boys are trying to freak me out, that’s bullocks, Tanya isn’t that type of woman. So I propose we get a pug, they are cute and take up less space, it will be fun to have the doggy around to cheer us up.

I know many people of middle age complain about youth today, but I don’t! I think they are like us when we were young, we seemed obscene and vulgar to older men and women too. I suppose it’s some fear of grown people about what these kids are going to create as a future. As long as these youngsters are enthusiastic and hard-working I’m sure we’ll manage, but I am afraid there are more and more of them who are either maniacal overachievers or completely apathetical and desperate souls. I hope I am wrong and I hope they grow out of it, but I can’t blame them. Maybe I am wrong in estimating there are more kids with radical attitudes towards life. Perhaps we were the same way, though we live in very different economic and social situations today. I’d like to see more young and enthusiastic people though, the whole world needs them.

You know, I stopped sharing a long time ago because people can be very idiotic when it comes to somebody else’s pain. I get the lamest advice ever and I didn’t ask for advice in the first place! I just wanted an ear to pour my soul into. Ah, what do they know about my pain in reality? How dare they offer me cures when they haven’t even listened to what I have to say is aching? I haven’t told anybody a significant piece of information for over six months and what bothers me now is nobody shows much care about this. Well, nobody except three girls, but for two of them I am certain they feel this way because they are more insecure in our relationship like this. I can completely understand that, but they should stop with the silly judgmental attitude and everything will come back to normal, even though I feel I’ve don’t want to complain at all anymore.

Oh, I went to see Nora’s apartment after the makeover and it was fabulous! She spent time at relatives before all the work was done, but as I see it was completely worth it. She has new wall colors, new furniture, the windows are bigger and the kitchen is top-notch. I cannot miss how beautiful the decoration is, especially one sun metal sculpture. I am a big fan of sun-themed objects; I have about a dozen pendulums with different styles of the sun. I suppose everybody would appreciate truly beautiful art and the whole apartment is like a cozy complete harmonic piece of artwork. I’m happy for Nora, she worked hard to rebuilt the awful apartment her parents left her. They did as much as they could of course, but it was no good for anything else than depressing you before the renewal.